Courtney Love Is So Hot - An Editorial

Carl Ambrose, a self proclaimed "Anerkist Redneck," is from Perry Georgia, just south of Macon.

I’m going to go on record. I think Coutney Love is the hottest thing since mother’s proding rod. I love her blonde hair. Sometimes she has it other colors, but I can always see her golden locks shining through. She’s best as a blonde. It’s her true color. Whenever she plays that chord she knows on her guitar, I just melt. She has the nicest lips. I love watching her mouth when she sings. When I watch her sing, I sometimes imagine her mouth doing other things. Like kissing me and yelling at me for eating all my chips.

Courtney Love can do anything. She’s so tough. She can act and light up the screen or she can sing a song and light up my heart or she can walk down the street punching people and light up some police sirens. Nobody tells Courtney what to do. If you did, she’d punch you in the nose. I love Courtney’s nose. I love her giant nostrils. If I saw Courney I’d put some grapes in her nostrils. I bet they’d fit. I know a lot of guys don’t like how she’s always punching people and throwing stuff like children on their bikes and cake doughnuts. They think that’s a turn-off. But to me, that’s part of her charm. How are you ever going to learn if she doesn’t throw a frying pan at you? It’s her love coming out. That’s all.

Courtney always looks like she's about to pee on something. I like that. Not many girls can pull that look off. Mother is telling me to get off the computer. "Get off Courtney," she says. Courtney is also the name of my computer. Coincedince? No. I named my computer after Courtney Love.

I was totally into Courtney before she married Kurt Cobain. Then, when she killed him, I was totally into her even more because she was now single and showed she could use a firearm.